Reading this thread has been very valuable and helpful for me. I am 60. Very fit and in excellent shape, 7 months post op with nerve sparing. Two PSA readings since: 0.02 then 0.048.
Initially, I thought my erections were ok and improving but that was only whilst masturbating. And, really, total firmness was only achieved at orgasm. Previously, I had had very strong erections and a healthy sex drive. My libido has gradually decreased since the op.
In the past month, I have started a relationship with a beautiful and very sexual woman. In that regard, I am in heaven. But in the bed: the first attempt was the road-to-hell. I was utterly distraught. Sildenafil did nothing but I thought that it had previously worked with masturbation. She was very kind and understanding and incredibly emotionally wise, for which I am very grateful. But I felt stripped of my manhood. We talked at the time and we made progress in some aspect. She had a good time but I felt extremely challenged and vulnerable. I still thought it could be the end of the relationship.
Two days later, after more talking and sharing of feelings, I have some perspective. I actually have so much to be grateful for.
Reading Prostate Pete's post brought me to tears. Post op, I have become much more able to access my feelings and I am grateful for that. I am not ashamed to be scared, to cry, to tell people how I feel.
Thank you to all you good men for sharing.
Ok. Update. Nearly a month on. I took a pill and purchased a penis pump (great alliteration) but neither the alliteration, nor the pump, nor the pill, did anything for me. I also spent coin on a cock ring, but that was of little help (!).
Incredibly, and thankfully, my erections have started to function to some extent without all the paraphernalia. Hooray! They are not consistent and do not stay the full length (!) but there is a clear improvement. Why? I am not sure.
Sex remains a challenge, psychologically and physically. However, I feel very encouraged that there IS change, improvement and further opportunity to explore sexual avenues that are, as yet, unexplored. My beautiful and understanding partner is key. We talk. We accept. We slow down. We are grateful.
Edited by member 16 Dec 2022 at 21:22
| Reason: update