Kidney failure

He had his tattoo marked tonight so radiotherapy tomorrow . . Not sure how long the spinal cord compression has been there as since Saturday he’s only had a sciatic style pain down one leg .toilet ok so hopefully fingers and toes crossed he is ok .

his psa was 398 and 5 weeks on Abi it went up to 430 and now 9 weeks 530 oncologist said it’s not going up as fast as before but definitely not coming down so I’m guessing that is failing ??? He started end of July so within 3 months .

Best of luck for today, hope the RT goes well for Gary x

Gary called me today and said he had no feeling in his legs and when asked to move them he couldn’t , his bum is numb too .

He had two sessions of radiotherapy to whole spine (Thursday and Friday ) and it looks like it’s made it worse ? Am I thinking radiotherphy is not working or is it to early to tell that this happened before it gets better .

Thank you , I’m trying to keep it together for my 4 year old ,who doesn’t really understand and don’t really have any extended family apart from my brother who went on holiday yesterday for a week . I have some very good friends 

I spoke to gary last night and he has urine retention so have fitted a Catheter, 

Gary has skull mets , they showed on a scan in June , I didn’t tell him I knew as I wanted to carry on as normal . They have repeated a CT head scan on Thursday so I’m sure we will find results in the next few days . 

I will try and seek some help , I left my jacket on the tube on Thursday , didn’t realise until I got to the hospital , stupid tired and stressed . 

Today has been probably one of the worst days of this horrible cancer journey .

I went into see gary and the doctor on the ward came around , she said it was highly unlikely now gary would regain any walking abilities, or bladder or bowel control . And sending him home would provide a high level of care. 
I just thought I would ask if they are still giving him the abiratarone and she said no . It’s failing and I ask if anything else they could do  to be honest I was so shocked I sobbed and couldn’t even think what to say . 
gary said “ is that it ?” and she said unfortunately yes , to put his affairs in order and spend what ever inheritance he was going give.then drawn the curtain back and on to the next patient . 

I probably somewhere in me knew that gary was not on a good place but to hear it out loud and so matter of fact , 

they are still continuing radiotherapy to his spine and another doctor /radiologist came to talk to me . He is going to give fart radiotherapy to the skull base as he has numbness in his lip and chin and cancer growing behind his eye to relive pressure.5 sessions .he added they will add bicalutamide ( which I’m sure gary has had) to the mix .

after all the radiotherapy they discussed coming home I assume to die . 

my beautiful husband , 55 years old will probably not see Christmas and a 4 year old who will be robbed off her dad . I feel so utterly destroyed 

I can't remember whether you said you were already receiving PIP but if not, ask the hospital team to fill in their bit of the application urgently as that money will help you to pay for whatever is needed to be able to care for Gary - home care assistance, a medical bed / air mattress to prevent pressure sores, etc. You may be eligible for carer's benefit which will also help. A difficult conversation to be had about where G would like to die, at home or in a hospice. The hospital will begin liaising with local authority social services to put together a care plan - don't agree to him coming home without a care plan in place.

Macmillan have some good resources for helping to explain to children and your local hospice may also have advice on this or even a children's support worker. Finally, Macmillan, Maggie's and/ or your local hospice should be able to offer support to you over the coming weeks and months.

So sad to hear this news my thoughts are with you it is totally shocking news hopefully you will have the care needed at this time gaz