Is it normal to feel miserable?

Chris,

I am holding out for some certainty but understand that the scan isn’t foolproof.  I think that’s why she was suggesting the choline scan if the PSMA wasn’t showing anything. 

It’s a bit of a juggling act isn’t it?

Decho,

I completely agree that talking really helps, especially to people who either have personal experience of it or who are experts. I’ve found a support worker at the MacMillan centre at my hospital who was an oncology nurse for 30 years and is full to the brim with common sense and wisdom. I was lucky to find her but you need to put yourself out there and ask what’s available. I have been surprised at what is available to me.

I really hope you won’t need a second line of defence and that your treatment continues to work for you.

Kev, glad to hear things are going well for you. I hope the side effects of the HT have been manageable?

Adrian, sorry to hear that it’s in your family too. as you say at least you’re aware of it and can encourage your boys to get checked. Early diagnosis is our friend. I got my older brother to have a blood test which thankfully was clear.

I agree with your point that there’s always someone worse off, but none of us should be hard on ourselves if we’re feeling rubbish about our own cancer. I’ve felt like a fraud a lot and now realise that that doesn’t help me or anyone else. As the counsellor would say, be kind to yourself. Having said that, I think there is also a place for a bit of old fashioned stiff upper lip. If you can find the balance between the two, happy(ish) days.

Sorry to hear about your other health problems. Dealing with two major issues at once must be difficult. Hats off again to wives and partners for propping us up!

And please don’t apologise for a long post. I think it’s really helpful to write things down and for everyone else to get a more rounded picture of what else is going on in your life and your head. That way they can offer more nuanced advice and support.

Cheers

Nick

Hi Nick, 

I didn't have HT with my SRT, it wasn't offered and I didn't want it anyway. My oncologist wanted to go early without waiting to hit 0.2 and a scan. I think the positive margin was a clue to the source of the rising PSA. At the time I saw it as a gamble but it's paid off so far. 

We're all different though, so don't let me sway you from your pathway. You've got to do what's right for you, I think it's just as difficult a decision as the one we all take at diagnosis regarding treatment.

Good luck. 

Kev.

Kev, your position sounds very similar to mine. I could decline the HT but when I asked if that was a possibility, the onco gave me a very funny look and said ‘ well, you could….’

So I’ve just gone with what she suggested and am sure it’s right for me. I think!

Nick