HT a question for the wives

Thanks for the update Wiosal, kind of surprised that size has decreased after this period of time...need to get pumping ASAP, that has certainly helped MY size, I’m glad DH doesn’t have hot flushes yet, maybe he’ll be lucky🤞

Ive never had a testosterone test…wish I had at the start so I could see how it’s decreased but I’m going to ask for one when I get my next PSA test in December. I’m just hoping that my PSA has fallen again…or at least stayed put🤞🤞🤞

It’s great for both of you that he still has his libido and long may it continue. If it falls away, don’t give up(unless you want to) because you can still have a lot of fun. I find that I have zero interest in having sex, but when I get started with the right foreplay I can still have intense pleasure, as can my wife, it’s just different.😊

Good luck to both of you.

Derek

I have 2 sons, and used to be as tactless as that.  After the birth of our first child, I can remember asking a doctor when me and the wife would be able to have sex again. He said, "For God sake man! I haven't cut the umbilical cord yet!" 😉

Joking apart, I know how serious and sad, sexlife issues can be because of this disease. I read somewhere recently that sadly relationships, where couples are coping with prostate cancer, are more likely to break up than normal. It's certainly tested our marriage. My wife is 10 years younger than me, and much more desirable. We had an active sex life which was severely impacted by my prostate cancer treatment. She is much better at dealing with it than I am. I still feel emasculated, frustrated, insecure and depressed. Sometimes, these emotions bring out the worst in me. I get very grumpy and moody and isolate myself. She is much more upbeat and optimistic. 

Over the past year we're gradually accepting the lack of rumpy pumpy, but it isn't easy. We go out more and I try my hardest to find other ways to make her feel as special as I used to. I'm trying to fill the sex void with more romance. It appears to be working.

Adrian.

Edited by member 15 Nov 2023 at 22:25  | Reason: Typo

But the situation, does still get on top of her. To get some extra support, to help her deal with  my moody behaviour, she is trying to be referred for counseling with an organisation that operates from a local hospital and deals primarily with the partners of cancer suffers. 

To add to our problems, about 5 years ago, I had an angiogram which showed I had badly calcified arteries. Initially,  this was sucessfully dealt with by medication. I was  shocked because I thought I was fit. Until I was almost 50 years old, I used to run 5 miles everyday and do 5 x 80 press ups daily. 

Unfortunately the heart condition, although not  really  causing me any discomfort, caused problems to my treatment options, when they discovered prostate cancer. The anaesthetist  at pre prostatectomy assessment was concerned that my heart may not cope with the op. My cardiologist thought otherwise, this dispute delayed the op  two months.

 I got through the prostatectomy without a hitch,  but sod's law, two months later (as if to prove the anaesthetist right 🙂) I had a minor heart attack and was rushed to hospital.  I wad there for two weeks, before they drilled out some of the calcification, and fitted two stents. Great I thought I've now had a complete refit.

Sod's law again! Last week, the chest pains returned, and their now looking at more drilling and stenting, or possibly a bypass. I've been warned not to do anything to strenuous, that's why I spend a lot of time on here. 😄

Honestly, at times, I feel that unlucky that if I fell in a barrel of boobs I'd come up sucking my thumb. 😄

However, I'm always aware that there are couples that are a hell of a lot worse off than us. My health issues are relatively minor compared to others. My two lads and two step-children are in their 30's and 40's and I'm retired so there are no work problems. My heart (damaged though it maybe 😉) goes out to you younger couples dealing with prostate cancer, who have younger kids and still have work commitments. I'd struggle to cope with that.

Adrian

Edited by member 16 Nov 2023 at 17:33  | Reason: Additional text.

I was only on HT for a month whilst they decided whether  I could or couldn't  have prostate surgery. At that time they seemed to think RT was the more likely outcome and wanted to slow down disease progression.

I'm usually quite a laid back bloke but medical issues have frustrated me and I've definitely become more moody and bad tempered. 

I very sincerely wish you and your family well.

Edited by member 16 Nov 2023 at 19:19  | Reason: Typo